My Poor Posteria

Owwwww!

Remind me to bring a cusion next time I go to college workshop.

Those damn stools (chairs, Blake : ) .

Sitting on a flat 'no frills' piece of timber for over 2 hours is not an experience I would recommend to many people.

In fact I'm very tempted to sue the college due to 'mass booty neglegence'.

You see that colour purple there? Yeah? That's wot colour my butt is right now.

Now I know how Hank Hill's diminished glute feels without his fake heiney on (King of The Hill).

________________________________________________

DR. TATE: Mr. Hill, you have a compression of the discs in your lower back.

HANK: Uh-huh. Do you get a lot of this in your patients who race mowers?

DR. TATE: A lawnmower didn't cause this. It's genetic.

PEGGY: Genetic as in fatal?

DR. TATE: No. Mr. Hill, you were born with no muscle mass here, no cushioning. For years you've basically been sitting on your spine. You suffer from a disease called Diminished Gluteal Syndrome, or DGS.

HANK: I don't understand. What does that mean?

DR. TATE: Mr. Hill, you have no ass.

_______________________________________________

I can just, like, soooooo relate, you know?

Wibble.

P.S. Gem & Ash, thanks for joining me in a coupla' of rounds last night guys!

Blake, I just got that "PUT A BIT OF SELLOTAPE ON THE FRIDGE!" reference you posted ages ago (It's so old, I can't even find a link to it!).

A definate classic quote amongsted many! : )
I should of known where you got it from.

'Can I say, what a smashing blouse you've got on?'

Yakiddy Yak. U Gotta Love Things 'Tech'

Yes it's true.

Now being the 7:00 am starting kinda buzy boy I have been the past 2 days, I am now fully enlightened and aware of everything around me.

I've yet to eat my sandwich, but am certainly looking forward to it.

I've named it the Seb Sandwich. Which includes a classic mix of Sausage Egg & Bacon (S.E.B. - get it?)

Mmmm yummy.

Mind, I have to give credit to Mother's scrambled egg skills.
As most of you know, for reasons unknown, I absolutely cannot cook scrambled egg no matter how many times I attempt it - Previous results oddly ended up being both burnt & undercooked at the same time.

I red the Daily Metro on the way to Uni this morning, which was particularly interesting...

Apple are releasing a brand new iPod to add the collection called the iPod Shuffle which looks very fancy as well as the new Mac Mini which must be one of the coolest computers... EVER.

And I mean that. You can shove your iMacs & Powerbooks (no offence to my good friends who I know own one!) - this is the real deal.

I'm really considering buying a souped up one for round just £500.

Amazing stuff.

Hot off the press is the commotion that Light Emitting Diodes (LEDs) could replace the light bulb.

I also red about how much more advanced Japan's technology really is.

Everything they've got - we don't. There all just pipe dreams to us 'UKies'.

Imagine a Phone that can you tune TV channels into. A phone that records 2hours of material straight from a VHS or DVD recorder or a phone that even has a finger print sensor that is used to lock your mates from reading you inner-most inbox.

Imagine a 1Gb internet Connection!
Shwoooom Shwoooom! Pi-yow! Corr, that's UNBELIEVEABLY fast.

And yep you've guessed it. They've got it - we don't.

The good news is that this stuff will start to peek its way into are puny 'armish' lives over the next few months. I can't wait.

Now about this toothbrush thing... I've decided I really do have better things to do with my time - like go to a Tapas bar tonight (whatever that is) - so I'm not gonna talk about that today.
But if you want to tell me whether u think electric toothbrushes really are better or not, feel free to call in and have your say.

According to all ABC News us Bloggers are 'People Of The Year!' Boo!
It's not too late for any of you to join in the fun u know.
I'd be more than happy to subscribe to your lives. (Hey, that could be a cool chat-up line... or not)

Lastly, I mentioned yesterday that I was going to let you in on a litle secret of mine.

It's called www.allofmp3.com .
If you, like me, buy your songs off the internet rather than ill-eagle-ly. Then this is definitely the site for you.

Forget iTunes Music Store. It's pretty but it's prices simply DO NOT MATCH.

This allofmp3 site is a Russian site you see. Which means prices are cheap as chips.

We're talking 50p for an album.

I like those odds.

I've already bought about 6-7 albums off there myself and am quite happy to continue before such a bargain is discovered and most likely banned from the UK.

Don't worry. It's not at all dodgy looking and work just like any other professional web shop.

What you have to do is first of all click on the English page (unless of course your lingual skill are of the rushki origin), register on the site & then pay in say $10 which is then exchanged to rubles which is equal to a 1Gb allowance of whatever music yo want.
You then go to the V.I.P. page, browse though their selections, order the albums/tracks you want, then simply download them afterwards.
It's simply the best bargain I've ever discovered (even better then the reduced 10p donuts I see in Safeways staff bin).

I order you to check it out. It's too good to miss. On average, 1 song would cost $0.080. that's 8 Cents ... That's 4p.

Nuff sed.

One cool feature you have the option of, is the choice of format (mp3 being the obvious choice) as well as the bit rate from 128kbps to 320kbps. The ID tags are relatively accurate. The only annoying thing is the downloading part which needs doing manually (A small price to pay I think)

Well I'm going home now.

My butt-terior is aching like a bia-tch.
I've been sitting on a stool for about 5 hours now & I'm afraid when I stand up the seat will be stuck to my cheeks.

A New Leaf.

Hey Guys & Gals.

Happy New Year n' all.

For those of you who I didn't see over the midnight celebrations, I hope you enjoyed yourselves as much as I think I did.

For those who did see me... u suck, i hate you!

Nah, only joking : )

Well I'm finally back in education today, getting back into the routine of college life.

Though it's not all doom and gloom here in the E.&.C.

Oh no... I must tell you the wonderful, Happy New Years gift London transport took the thought of surprising me with this morning.

Oh yes... the London Mayer - ever the joker - has very kindly boosted my train & tube fare to an extra 50p which I, of course was happy obliged to contribute.

Afterall, It's all for the greater good of Mr. Livingstone's piggy bank isn't it?

I must write him a thank you letter sometime.


Well anyway, I decided that after a very long Christmas break, it's time to forget all the lay-z mornings, waking up at 11:0hwheneverifeellikeit...

Forget the enchanting Christmas tree chocolates, still not eaten...

Forget trying to remember what the hell happened New Years Eve in Portsmouth...

& Forget the general, 'sittin' around snackin' kinda lifestyle I come to casually let slip in to me the past few weeks.

Now, time for some action.

I'm ready to start working hard & sure as hell play hard.

I've figured that if I wake up at 7:00 in the morning every day, that means I have more to do in the day...
Which means I'll have the energy to do power shower (that's in and out in 3 mins flat), eat a solid breakfast (at least 1 bowl of healthy cereal - w/ fruit - accompanied by 2 rounds of marmite soldiers), make myself lunch for the day (including 1 of my most sought after sandwich creations), and then do all the other things that I was too lazy to do beforehand.

I guess you could call this a resolution really.

I wonder how long it'll be before I break it!

One question for all you Maccy lovers out there - what button do I use to skip though words rather than schilling through every letter?
On the PC's you hold Ctrl and use the left of right cursor, but that doesn't work on this blasted keyboard and it's driving me insane! Yeah I know they look nice, but I've been using PC's for so long that I can't get around them.


Neways I going to start planning my week.

In my next post I shall reveal my latest & greatest internet discovery plus post my results over which product really is the more effective - manual toothbrush or electric?

Ciao. x

Thanks for that email Louise - hope your alright over there in Malaysia.
Jane, did you use those iTunes vouchers I sent you? Did you even get them?
Gina, I bought the Kelis album off the internet in the end. Thanks for the offer anyway.
Ash, can you nab Shawshank off your ladyfriend next time you see her?
Can anyone tell what actually happens at the end of Donnie Darko? I watched it for the forth time yesterday & I'm still none the wiser.
Lastly, does any one have Becka's email? Thanks : )