Note To Self #2

Stop having late nights. Get some sleep, you zombie.

Note To Self #1

toothpaste goes on teeth, not in hair.

Kleenex

...Thank you! Thought that was really sweet. Put a smile on my face after what was generally a pretty cruddy day. "Glad to be of service my fellow hot chocolatonians :)"

Thursday night after close-down I hooked up with Ash & Newman for a quick drink in The Crown. It must of been my lucky night, as once again I ended up sharing a bed with Newman... As well as the Ash man too.

Mmm, Male Threesomes - Don't knock it until you try it people. (I'm kidding)

Seriously, looking back at that, I do think that that is an experience which could be potentially mind scarring if it was for the fact this wasn't the first time this has happened.

Personally, I wouldn't recommend it though... I've learnt that when it comes down to it, men are greedy-duvet-hogging-bastards. The fact that I spent most of my time desperately trying to ignore the accompanying nose whistling & bed farting while teetering precariously on the mattress edge, meant that a good night's sleep was out of the question.

Still, the pillow talk was entertaining :p

In other news today, as well discovering only a few hours ago that I spent the whole day wearing a big yellow poker on end of my nose for all to gawp at, I'm starting to feel the growing symptoms of a delightful virus, known as the common cold.

For those of you who don't know, the common cold is a charming old chap who likes to remind as all what it must feel like to be a leakey bathroom tap that suffers from a version of Tourettes Syndrome - one being that he would involuntarily shout "sniff" every 6 seconds.

The common cold also will often have you buying a number of popular remedies such as 'Lockets' or 'Lemsip' from your local pharmacy and listening to mother's sound advice, such as the fact you shouldn't drink milk, standing on your head for 5mins will help and always "wrap up warm"

NB: I regret to announce all of these examples will not make the slightest bit of difference. You'll still feel shit whatever.

What's more, the common cold will also give you the impression that everything and everyone around you is shit, and that life is just a piss pot for an giant cockroach living in space.

I envisage plesant times ahead for myself.

Sorry, I can tell already that I sound a right winge-y dipstick.
My apologies if I act a little off to any of you in the next few days.

It's just that along with wasps, I think colds are one of the most unnecessary existences in the rich tapestry that we call life.

If I'm going to be ill man, the kinder thing to do would be to at least give me an valid illness excusable of a sick day.

Jeez!